Chapter 44: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

On the quiet street, a large mosaic creature was stumbling along—this was Gintoki Sakata. As he walked, Gintoki glanced toward the corners; those idiots had said they would protect him from the shadows, yet he hadn’t seen a single trace of them. He pulled out the radio from his pocket and began to contact them.

“This is Gin-san. Where are you all hiding? I don’t see any of you. Over,” Gintoki whispered.

After a few crackling bursts of static, Shinpachi’s voice came through.

“Don’t worry, Gin-san. We’re right nearby. Just keep walking, it’s fine. Over.”

“No, Shinpachi, it’s too scary! Please, someone come and keep me company. Over.”

Okakura’s voice joined in: “Gin-san, Kiku is cunning, if we show ourselves it won’t come out. Sorry, you have to go alone. When it’s all over, I’ll buy you a strawberry milk. Over.”

“Strawberry milk? Sure, but Gin-san wants a year’s supply! Over.”

Then Katsura’s voice appeared: “Ah, Boss, do you have soba noodles there besides oden? Over.”

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“You idiots said you were nearby! Why did you all run off to eat oden? Over!” Gintoki roared into the radio.

“Ah, Gin-san, it’s just too cold tonight. Don’t worry, if anything happens, just shout. We’ll come right away. Okakura put a GPS tracker on you, we’ll find you. Over.” Higashi’s voice had barely finished when the radio buzzed again—this time it was Saigo.

“Hahaha, Pops, another bottle of shochu! Tonight, let’s drink to our hearts’ content! Over.”

“Drink to your hearts’ content, my foot! Gin-san is here scared out of his wits, and you idiots are off drinking. Go to hell, all of you! Over.” Gintoki shouted, then smashed the radio to the ground.

“Whew, whew, whew, I’m done with this. Why am I left here trembling in the dark while those guys are having fun and drinking? Gin-san is going to find a bar and drink too.” He grumbled angrily, turning to retrace his steps.

Clatter—behind him came the sound of a toppled trash can.

Sweat streamed down Gintoki’s face and body. He stood frozen, refusing to look back.

“Shinpachi, Katsura, Okakura, is that you?” Gintoki stammered.

No one answered. The silence behind him persisted.

“H-ha-ha, it’s probably just a cat or stray dog. Nothing to worry about, nothing at all. I’ll just keep walking.” He tried to reassure himself, stepping forward to continue.

Crackle—just then, the discarded radio sparked to life again. Okakura’s voice came through.

“Gin-san, we just noticed an unidentified creature behind you. Katsura says it might be a cat and wants you to catch it for him. Over.” Then Katsura chimed in.

“Haha, Gintoki, it looks like a meatball appeared behind you. Can you catch it for me? Over.”

At this, Gintoki instinctively turned around—

Enormous! An enormous chrysanthemum bloomed (those who know, know what this means).

Under the streetlight, a chrysanthemum monster, also pixelated like him, was oozing sticky liquid as it faced him.

Those two idiots—meatball? This was a meat wall!

“Ahhhh, help! Kiku appeared! Ahhhh!” Gintoki screamed and bolted.

Just then, the radio he’d left behind crackled and Katsura’s voice returned.

“Gintoki, Gintoki, why aren’t you answering? Did you get charmed by the meatball? Haha, I knew meatballs had a peculiar allure. Over.”

Who would be charmed by that chrysanthemum monster! Gintoki thought that if Katsura appeared in front of him now, he’d stuff his head right into that chrysanthemum behind him.

He glanced back again—he saw the monster’s flesh cavern slowly opening. The crimson walls were lined with countless sharp serrated teeth, and sticky tentacles writhed everywhere.

“Help!” Gintoki once more poured on the speed, fleeing.

But then a tentacle whipped out and wrapped around his leg, yanking him to the ground.

The monster dragged him inch by inch across the floor, Gintoki’s fingernails gouging long marks as he tried to resist, but the creature’s strength was overwhelming.

Kiku pulled Gintoki over and swallowed his mosaic-covered head into the fleshy chrysanthemum cavern, slowly devouring him. The scene was censored beyond belief.

“Ah, help! Gin-san’s mitama on my head and my kintama below are both going to be swallowed!” Gintoki screamed.

At that moment, his mitama was already two-thirds engulfed, and Kiku began chewing on his kintama, the crunching sounds echoing.

Just as Gintoki struggled to tear the monster costume off and escape, someone dropped down from above and cleaved Kiku in two with a single stroke.

“O-Okakura…” Gintoki gasped, still in shock.

“Gin-san, are you alright?” Okakura asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just nearly lost my kintama, that’s all.” Gintoki said as he got up.

The drag queen troupe and Shinpachi, Katsura, arrived then.

“Whoa, this monster is huge.”

“And the shape looks so familiar…”

“Is it a chrysanthemum?”

The drag queens murmured among themselves.

At that moment, the split chrysanthemum monster on the ground fused back together.

“Tch, I missed the mark,” Okakura said, preparing to draw her sword for another attack. But someone grabbed her hand. She turned—Squidko was there.

“Can you leave it to me, Okakura?”

Seeing the resolve in Squidko’s eyes, Okakura hesitated for a moment, then handed over her sword.

“Thank you,” Squidko said, accepting the blade.

“Make sure to cut it into smaller pieces, otherwise it’ll just recombine,” Okakura warned.

Squidko nodded.

“Monster, today I’m going to teach you, a brainless creature, one thing, and that is…”

“Drag queens are the strongest!” Squidko shouted, charging forward and instantly slicing the monster into countless fragments. Yellow slime splattered everywhere, releasing a faint stench.

The serial killings in Edo were over.

“Ugh, I’m exhausted. I don’t feel cool at all tonight,” Gintoki complained as he massaged his shoulder.

“But isn’t it nice to let others handle things once in a while, Gin-san?” Okakura said.

“That’s true. People can’t always rely on others to protect what’s precious to them. Otherwise, it’s not really precious,” Gintoki replied.

The case was closed, but Okakura’s group still had work to do. She contacted members of the Auxiliary Police Alliance and the Shinsengumi to handle the aftermath, and everyone went to the Shinsengumi for statements.

By the time the Shinsengumi released them, dawn had broken. The drag queen troupe, Okakura, Gintoki, and the others stretched in the sunlight outside the Shinsengumi headquarters.

“Ah, I haven’t been up this early in ages,” Gintoki yawned.

“That’s because you drink every night and sleep late. It’s a miracle you’re up,” Shinpachi replied.

“Everyone, thank you for helping me solve this case. Next time I’ll treat you all to drinks,” Okakura smiled.

“But before that, I recall you promised to buy Gin-san strawberry milk,” Gintoki said, placing a hand on Okakura’s shoulder.

“Yes, I made a promise and I won’t break it,” Okakura replied, then made a call: “Osai-kun, it’s me. Sorry, can you deliver—wait.” Okakura covered the receiver and asked Gintoki, “Gin-san, how much milk do you want?”

“One hundred cases!” Gintoki said cheerfully.

“All right, Osai-kun, please deliver one hundred cases of strawberry milk to the Yorozuya in Kabukicho.”

“All set, Gin-san. You’ll have your strawberry milk soon. Even though you didn’t really help much this time, a promise is a promise,” Okakura smiled.

“Who says Gin-san didn’t help? I wore that kintama-shaped monster head and lured the creature out, after all,” Gintoki protested.

“Gin-san, Okakura, we’re heading back. Come visit us sometime!” the drag queens called as they prepared to leave.

“Bye, Higashi,” Gintoki waved.

“Who’s Higashi? I’m Azuma!” she said, then turned to Okakura: “Okakura, come visit often. Next time I’ll give you a discount!”

Okakura nodded. “Definitely, I’ll come.”

Triangle Panties also said goodbye: “Okakura, pick me next time. I’ll take good care of you.”

“Sure, Triangle Panties-san.”

Watching the drag queen troupe laughing in the sunlight, Okakura couldn’t help but sigh, “What a joyful group.”

“That’s because outsiders’ opinions don’t matter to them. As long as their companions are by their side, that’s enough,” Gintoki said, shielding his eyes from the glaring sun.

Even drag queens can shine brilliantly.

“Come to think of it, I haven’t visited Gin-san’s Yorozuya yet. Why not take me for a tour now?” Okakura said.

“Sure,” Gintoki agreed.

“Then let’s go—show me your Yorozuya.”

And so, led by Shinpachi and Gintoki, Okakura followed them toward the Yorozuya.