Chapter 56: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

Octopus Gin, a large white octopus with blue spots, is now well known as Minister Okakura Take’s beloved pet among all the members of the Cosmic Police Alliance. The creature is always glued to Minister Okakura, so everyone has grown quite familiar with it (wait—“it”?).

“Shinpachi, Gin-chan seems even sicker than last time,” Kagura rested her chin in her palm, gazing at the white octopus ahead.

The octopus was rolling around at Okakura Take’s feet, begging for attention, but the minister still had mountains of paperwork to process and paid him no mind. Octopus Gin wrapped his tentacle around Okakura’s ankle, rubbing against her persistently.

“Kagura-chan, Gin-san has caught a new illness called ‘obsessive stalker’,” Shinpachi adjusted his glasses.

No! Even a stalker isn’t as clingy as that octopus!

“Can an octopus catch that kind of disease?” Kagura asked curiously.

“That particular affliction knows no bounds of age, gender, or species. And Gin-san’s behavior really has no difference from a stalker,” Shinpachi replied.

“In a way, poor Take-chan is really unlucky to be stuck with that octopus,” Kagura commented.

“You’re absolutely right, Kagura-chan,” Shinpachi agreed.

Okakura Take, glued to the octopus, was struggling to process her files. She found Earth's affairs even more numerous than those of Central Nation Star—possibly because Earth lacked absolute sovereignty, leading various aliens to stir up trouble and create endless difficulties.

Just as Okakura was about to tackle her next document, a kunai shattered the window glass and lodged itself beside her hand.

A kunai… Could it be that other person with stalker tendencies?!

“Gin-san!” A high-pitched female voice rang from outside. A slender, long-eyed female ninja burst through the window.

“…” Okakura Take. Of course, it was her—Sarutobi Ayame!

“Gin-san, I heard you’ve turned into an octopus! But it doesn’t matter. Even if you’re an octopus, I will still love you. Come, let’s find a quiet place, wrap your tentacles tightly around me, Gin-san!!”

“…” Shinpachi.

“Um, Miss Sarutobi, your glasses fell again. I’m Shinpachi. And what are you planning to do with an octopus in a quiet place?! Leave him alone, he’s just an octopus now!” Shinpachi protested, as Sarutobi Ayame squeezed him tightly in her arms, nearly suffocating him.

Kagura handed Sarutobi her fallen glasses. She put them on, and her blurry vision cleared instantly.

“Killer mode: on!” Sarutobi took out some natto and stuck Shinpachi into a sticky bundle, tossing him aside.

“Miss Sarutobi, what are you doing?! Let go of me!” Shinpachi yelled, struggling in the natto threads.

Kagura pinched her nose in disgust. “So smelly, four-eyes, keep your distance.”

“Is this my fault?!” Shinpachi roared.

At that moment, Sarutobi spotted the white-and-blue octopus at Okakura’s feet.

Yes! That’s her Gin-san—the silver-white hue and the sadistic aura gleaming from its beady eyes. She couldn’t contain herself!

How did she even see a sadistic aura in those beady eyes? Okakura was speechless. Sarutobi’s fantasies seemed to materialize in reality—truly astonishing.

“Gin-san!” Sarutobi leapt and hugged Octopus Gin, rubbing herself fervently against his slippery body.

“Gin-san, ahhh—this cold, slick feeling is amazing! Gin-san, wrap around me, tighter, tighter, never let go!”

The white octopus looked terrified, struggling in Sarutobi’s embrace, sliding free at last and hiding behind Okakura Take.

“You again! Give Gin-san back to me!” Sarutobi brandished a kunai at Okakura.

“…” Okakura. She was completely innocent—this octopus simply wouldn’t let go!

“Miss Sarutobi, calm down. You want the octopus, right? Fine, I’ll give him to you,” Okakura stood decisively, intending to hand over the octopus.

But the moment she stood, the octopus reached out his tentacle and grabbed her wrist, looking up with those big, innocent black eyes as if to say, “Where are you going?”

One second…

Two seconds…

…

Five seconds later, Okakura surrendered. Help! The lethality of that gaze was too much. Women really have no resistance to those eyes.

“I’m sorry, Miss Sarutobi. Wait until this octopus turns back into that useless curly-haired guy before you claim him. For now, he’s my pet,” Okakura turned and told Sarutobi.

“You must be joking! Gin-san is my master! I’ve known all along you harbor ill intentions toward him. You like Gin-san, don’t you? Ha! Don’t even dream—I’ve already played every game with Gin-san, ohohohoho!” The little monkey covered her mouth and laughed aloud.

“Who’d like that useless Gin with the curly hair! Relax, he’s much cuter as an octopus,” Okakura retorted.

No sooner had she spoken than Sarutobi fired a volley of kunai at her. Okakura dodged swiftly.

“Enough nonsense, woman! Don’t think you can get Gin-san this way. I am Gin-san’s most cherished pet!” Sarutobi lunged at Okakura.

“I keep telling you, I have zero interest in that useless guy!” Okakura shouted.

Minutes later, Okakura had defeated Sarutobi, tying her up tightly and throwing her onto the sofa.

Okakura walked over, pinched Sarutobi’s chin, and smiled. “Miss Sarutobi, you are the pet of my pet, which makes me your master. If you come after me again, I won’t be so polite. I’ve already said, the octopus is my pet. If it’s that human-shaped loser, do whatever you like.”

“Shinpachi, after Gin-chan became an octopus, not only is he harder to deal with, but he seems to have much better luck with women,” Kagura said, picking her nose and lying on the coffee table.

“Before you say that, can you please help me!” Shinpachi continued to struggle in the natto threads.

Sarutobi, chin pinched, suddenly shivered. Oh no, this woman is super sadistic! Her masochistic nature couldn’t help but quiver when faced with an S-type!

This woman was even more sadistic than Shimura Tae, the gorilla—she was a formidable opponent. If this went on, she’d end up turning into a sow under this woman’s hand…

Sarutobi took advantage of Okakura’s momentary release, sprang up from the sofa, and flicked a tiny smoke bomb from her glasses.

Bang! Yellow smoke filled the entire office.

“Ohohohoho! Goodbye—remember, Gin-san is mine. I’ll be back!”

“Ugh, cough, cough—what kind of villain exit line is that?” Okakura covered her mouth and grumbled.

When the smoke cleared, Okakura saw only a piece of rope by the window—Sarutobi had already escaped.

The noisy masochistic fool was gone. Okakura resumed her paperwork, Shinpachi struggled free from the natto, and he and Kagura went back to cleaning.

“Take-chan, we’re heading back. Please look after the octopus,” Kagura said.

Kagura and Shinpachi had finished cleaning and were ready to leave.

“Ah, Kagura-chan, Shinpachi, goodbye, see you tomorrow,” Okakura waved.

“Miss Okakura, thank you for your trouble today. Goodbye,” Shinpachi said, and left with Kagura.

Now, only Okakura and the octopus remained. Octopus Gin loosened his grip on Okakura’s wrist considerably. Okakura sighed—whenever anyone else was around, this octopus would cling to her for dear life.

As Okakura was finishing her last document, her phone rang—an email.

She opened it, and sure enough, it was from that email fanatic.

[Take-chan, let’s have dinner together tonight. Eating alone is lonely. Sharing good food with someone is always more joyful (●′w`●).
Saburo.]

[I’m sorry, Mr. Sasaki. I’m still at the department handling paperwork, so I must decline your invitation.
Okakura Take.]

[No worries, Take-chan. I’m right downstairs at your building~. Take-chan, look outside, there’s a surprise waiting for you (,,▽,,).
Saburo.]

Okakura stood and looked out the window—sure enough, she saw the tall figure in a white uniform.

Surprise? This was clearly a shock.

Looks like she couldn’t refuse any longer…

[Mr. Sasaki, since you’ve come all the way downstairs, let’s go enjoy your recommended meal together. But could we bring an octopus along?
Okakura Take.]

[An octopus?
Sasaki Isaburo.]

When Okakura and Octopus Gin appeared before Sasaki Isaburo, he showed no change in expression upon seeing the octopus, though his tone sounded quite surprised.

“As expected of Miss Okakura—even her pets are extraordinary,” Sasaki remarked.

“Heh, heh, thank you for the compliment,” Okakura laughed awkwardly. There was no choice but to claim Octopus Gin as her pet.

“Come, Miss Okakura, please get in the car,” Sasaki said, opening the front passenger door for her.

Okakura had just gotten in when the octopus tried to follow, but the front seat was far too cramped for his massive bulk—he even occupied the driver’s seat.

“Sorry, Mr. Sasaki, my pet is rather clingy. I’ll sit with him in the back,” Okakura said.

“Certainly—an elite respects a woman’s choice,” Sasaki replied, opening the rear door.

“Thank you, Mr. Sasaki.” Okakura brought Octopus Gin into the back seat.

“I’d like to take Miss Okakura to try Japanese cuisine today. How does that sound?” Sasaki asked as he drove.

“That sounds fine, Mr. Sasaki,” Okakura replied.

Because Octopus Gin was so large, he pressed himself entirely against Okakura. He was utterly content, resting his head on her lap, blinking his black beady eyes, looking delighted.

“…” Okakura. Did this useless curly-haired man’s human heart still exist?!

Soon, they arrived at the sushi restaurant. Okakura was relieved that Sasaki always chose places with few customers and exorbitant prices, so Octopus Gin wouldn’t draw much attention.

Thus, the three, plus one octopus, sat in a private room. Octopus Gin and Okakura together on one side, Sasaki alone on the other.

When the food arrived, Octopus Gin reached out his tentacle to grab it directly, but Okakura quickly smacked it down.

“Gin, you can’t do that!” She turned to Sasaki with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Mr. Sasaki, my Gin is very unruly. I hope you don’t mind.”

Sasaki adjusted his glasses. “Of course not. If it’s your pet, Miss Okakura, I’ll care for it as well.”

“I’m truly sorry, Mr. Sasaki. Gin is spoiled at home—he can’t bear to be away from me and insists on eating at the same table,” Okakura said in a fond, doting tone.

“No need to worry. Didn’t I say so? Miss Okakura, I don’t mind at all. An elite can accept any novelty.”

We get it, you’re an elite, you jerk! Repeating it over and over just annoys people!

Okakura began using her chopsticks to place food onto Octopus Gin’s plate. He was delighted, grabbing food with his tentacles and stuffing it in his mouth.

Sasaki truly didn’t seem to mind; he calmly picked up his food with chopsticks, chewing slowly. At moments like these, Okakura had to admit that Sasaki Isaburo was indeed raised by a distinguished family—his aura in the details was remarkable.

Okakura glanced at the octopus happily eating beside her, recalling Gin’s human form… That useless curly-haired man radiated nothing but loser vibes.

“Eel is perfect for summer, Miss Okakura. You should try the eel here—it’s quite good,” Sasaki said.

“All right, I’ll try it,” Okakura tasted it and found it excellent.

“Miss Okakura,” Sasaki suddenly called out.

“What is it?” Okakura asked.

“There’s some sauce on your face…” Sasaki gently placed his fingertip on Okakura’s cheek, lightly stroking it.

Before Okakura could react, Octopus Gin exploded with his tentacles, swinging a limb at Sasaki.

Sasaki quickly withdrew his hand, but was still struck. He felt a sharp pain in his finger, and on inspection, saw a bruise forming.

Octopus Gin, meanwhile, had wrapped all eight tentacles around Okakura, his black beady eyes staring straight at Sasaki. Under the lamplight, a red glint seemed to flicker in those dark pupils.

Sasaki looked at the octopus and smiled. “Miss Okakura, you truly have a fiercely protective pet.”

What an annoying octopus!

Author’s note: Here’s a confession. I’ve been revisiting Gintama’s story out of order—sometimes reading the manga, sometimes watching the TV series, always picking scenes I want to see. As a result, I’ve messed up the timeline… So, I skipped the Benizakura arc, the Shinsengumi rebellion arc, and the Ryugu arc, haha (smack!). Thank you to everyone who sent me grenades—Madman will use tentacles to wrap you up and beg for attention too~~~ (gross).

Younian threw a grenade. Toss time: 2014-05-20 23:17:37

Koukou Muzi Warm Man☆ threw a grenade. Toss time: 2014-05-21 10:42:18