Chapter 98: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

Inside the women's restroom, Okakura Take, Sarutobi, and Tsukuyomi exchanged bewildered glances. Sarutobi stood before the urinal, clutching her belt with a conflicted expression. She couldn’t help but turn toward the other two standing nearby and ask, “What exactly is the proper way for a man to pee?”

“No idea!” Okakura Take and Tsukuyomi shouted in unison.

“I’m already bursting, but I really have no clue how to handle this. Why don’t you two try it with me? We can figure it out together,” Sarutobi said hopefully, looking at Okakura Take and Tsukuyomi.

Immediately, Okakura Take and Tsukuyomi turned their heads away, pretending to whistle casually.

“You two bastards! Don’t ignore me!” Sarutobi snapped angrily.

“Sarutobi, it’s simple. Just hold your ‘weapon’ and aim it at the urinal,” Okakura Take offered some advice.

“Yeah, and I’d rather not see your filthy thing. Maybe you should stand a bit farther away,” Tsukuyomi squinted and added.

“You filthy woman! Who are you calling filthy? You’ve got one down there now too, you know!” Sarutobi shouted back furiously at Tsukuyomi.

“Ah, I can’t do it here in front of you two. I’m going inside to pee,” Sarutobi said, then dashed into a stall.

“What a troublesome one,” Tsukuyomi muttered, exhaling a ring of smoke.

“They just turned into men; their skills are bound to be rusty,” Okakura Take said with a raised brow, eyes filled with teasing as she looked toward the stall Sarutobi had entered.

Suddenly, a wailing alarm echoed through Kabukicho, reaching the women's restroom. Okakura Take and Tsukuyomi instinctively looked at each other, both puzzled.

What on earth was happening?

[Emergency Alert: From now on, Kabukicho is under a special state of martial law. Citizens in and around Kabukicho, please follow instructions from nearby government personnel. Do not panic, and do not leave the streets until further notice!]

[Repeating the announcement…]

The loudspeaker announcement from Kabukicho reverberated into the restroom, heard clearly by Okakura Take and Tsukuyomi.

“The shogunate has sealed off the streets. Kabukicho has become an isolated island within the city once again,” Okakura Take sighed.

“Never thought we’d run into this kind of trouble,” Tsukuyomi sighed as well, her voice unusually deep in her new male form, her sigh exuding a strange allure.

“This is bad, Tsukuyomi, you’re way too handsome now. Most women wouldn’t be able to handle it,” Okakura Take said, running a hand over the goosebumps on her arm, amazed at how cool Tsukuyomi looked.

Tsukuyomi blinked, then glanced at Okakura Take before chuckling lightly. “Mutual, then.”

“I feel better now,” Sarutobi emerged from the stall, cheeks flushed with relief.

“So, what’s the plan now?” Okakura Take asked both of them.

“What else? We find the culprit behind all this!” Sarutobi yelled in frustration. “Damn it, when I find whoever did this to me, I’m going to give them a good thrashing.”

“Let’s split up and act separately. We’ll regroup here once we have news. Sound good?” Okakura Take proposed.

“Fine, I’ll team up with Tsukuyomi,” Sarutobi said, grabbing Tsukuyomi’s arm first.

“...” Okakura Take sighed. Sarutobi was probably still mad at her, but seeing her act like a high school girl sulking in a man’s body was hilarious.

“Alright, I’ll get moving then,” Okakura Take chuckled and waved goodbye as she left the restroom.

As she exited, she bumped into a middle-aged man wearing a women's kimono. The man blushed immediately, then shouted at the top of his lungs, “Pervert!!”

“...” Okakura Take grimaced.

In this world full of traps and oddities, life was truly complicated.

Okakura Take stepped out of the restroom and into the appliance section of a supermarket. Instantly, every TV screen around her went static. Then, images of a group of people wearing white headscarves, half their faces obscured, appeared.

“What is this?” Okakura Take, along with everyone else, stared at the screens.

[To all on Earth, have you accepted the divine gift from God?] The central figure spoke.

Divine gift? That was the Outou Sect! Okakura Take realized—they were the extremist cultists wanted across the universe.

[What is happening to you now is an undeniable reality, a trial from God—a trial!]

[You were born in the universe, divided into male and female by the will of the cosmic creator—the Outou God. This is His divine oracle. Yet, you have ignored His will, despising the gender He has bestowed upon you.]

[Men, who fear pain, hiding in pretty girl anime and romantic virtual games—fragile men.]

[Women, under the banner of gender equality, oppressing men, constantly asserting self-consciousness—arrogant women.]

[The Outou God is deeply saddened. Since you are so dissatisfied with your own gender, we will switch your sexes. Live anew as men and women.]

[Reflect earnestly, accept the gender given by God once again, and worship the cosmic deity Outou-sama...]

“What a joke!” Okakura Take’s anger flared. She couldn’t listen any longer to the words on the screen.

Fragile men? Arrogant women? The truly arrogant ones were those fanatics, meddling in others’ lives, imposing traps and restrictions, dictating what men and women should be like, but more importantly, what humans should be like!

Why impose so many shackles on the two sexes, binding people with outdated stereotypes? Gender is innate, but how one lives is their choice. No matter how flawed a person’s life may be, those bastards who punish others under the guise of God were far more disgusting!

[We... no, God will always watch you. Do not forget, hehehe, hahaha.] The Outou Sect’s message ended, and the television returned to normal, but Okakura Take’s fury burned fiercely.

She strode out of the department store and saw a group of Outou Sect members patrolling the street. To avoid alerting them, she passed by slowly, eyes discreetly watching their movements.

They didn’t seem very strong, but the Outou Sect had warned that if they acted rashly, they wouldn’t just affect Kabukicho—they’d make everyone on Earth switch sexes. That would be disastrous.

Kabukicho was already chaotic from the sex changes; if the whole world switched, the entire planet would descend into chaos.

“Uh, excuse me, can I have your email address?” a voice suddenly asked.

“Huh?” Okakura Take froze, looking at the bearded man in a women’s kimono before her. She was utterly confused.

“My name’s Yumi Nagasaki. Handsome guy, please tell me your email!” the bearded man coquettishly waved his phone.

“...” Okakura Take sighed. This guy clearly hadn’t adjusted from girl to guy in body and mind, but had he ever considered that the person he was hitting on might also be a girl?

[Heresy detected, heresy detected…]

Suddenly, an alarm sounded beside them. A group of Outou Sect members appeared and grabbed the bearded man by the arm, trying to drag him away.

“Hey! Wait, what are you doing? Let go of me!” the bearded man panicked and struggled, tears welling in his eyes, but he couldn’t break free.

“Let him go!” Okakura Take couldn’t stand it. She stepped forward to block them.

“Waaah…” The bearded man looked at her tearfully, whimpering softly.

“...” Okakura Take felt awkward. Although she knew he’d originally been a girl, seeing a burly man act so coquettishly was still strange.

“Do you want to be arrested as a heretic too?” The leader of the sect sneered.

“Heresy? That’s your label, not mine. Don’t bother. You can just put me in the enemy category directly,” Okakura Take said calmly.

“Grab that one too!” the sect member shouted. The others charged at Okakura Take.

“Hmph.” Okakura Take snorted and charged at them. These guys were weak; she took them all down in under a minute.

“Move!” Okakura Take ran to Yumi Nagasaki’s side, hoisting the stunned man onto her back.

In her male form, Okakura Take was 1.8 meters tall, while Yumi Nagasaki was 1.9 meters. Carrying him, she ran for a long time before finally shaking off the sect members.

During their escape, Okakura Take realized they were being tracked because the streets were riddled with surveillance cameras, installed by the Outou Sect. They could monitor them from the shadows.

“Phew, finally lost them…” Okakura Take found a blind spot with fewer cameras and set Yumi down.

“Handsome, you’re amazing!” Yumi immediately hugged her. Okakura Take nearly lost her breath from the bear hug.

“Let go! And first, I should tell you, I used to be a woman. You’ve got the wrong target,” Okakura Take pushed him away.

“No problem! You’re a man now, and a handsome one at that!” Yumi’s eyes sparkled.

“Yumi Nagasaki?” Okakura Take hesitated.

“Yes, anything you need?” Yumi asked expectantly.

“How old are you?” Okakura Take asked.

“Thirteen,” Yumi answered cheerfully.

“...” Okakura Take was stunned. This was serious—this thirteen-year-old loli had become a towering man. How tall had she been as a girl?

“Hey, what’s your name?” Yumi asked.

“Just call me Okakura,” she said, rubbing her forehead.

“Alright, darling,” Yumi grinned excitedly.

“Hey, I told you to call me Okakura…”

“Darling, after all that running you must be thirsty. Wait here, I’ll go get you some water from the convenience store across the street. Don’t leave me behind,” Yumi said, covering his face and quickly running off.

Watching the bearded man in a women’s kimono happily hopping away, Okakura Take felt utterly exhausted. The Outou Sect had really done a number on that little loli, turning her into a giant man.

As Okakura Take leaned against the wall waiting for Yumi, she heard two people approaching from behind. She glanced sideways—it wasn’t the Outou Sect, but two women: one slender with silver hair and the other plump with black hair.

The slim silver-haired woman in a white kimono pointed at Okakura Take and whispered loudly enough to hear, “Look, there’s a handsome guy up ahead, X-ko. Let’s see who can charm him first, hmph!” She puffed out her chest.

“You idiot, who’s X-ko? No man would like shameless women like you. They prefer women broad-minded and well-endowed like me!” The plump black-haired woman in a black kimono scoffed, puffing up even more.

“...” Okakura Take thought. No, even if you were a man, she wouldn’t want either of you loudmouth brats treating her like a fool to be hooked.

“Alright, you jerk, let’s both go ask him out for tea. He’ll definitely choose the cute me,” the silver-haired woman said, tilting her head.

“Fine, let’s go together. Compared to a fiery woman like you, that handsome guy will pick me in the end,” the black-haired woman boasted.

“...” Okakura Take wondered where their overconfidence came from.

But the silver-haired one looked familiar. Could it be...

“Hey, handsome! Come have tea with me!” The two women came closer, slapping Okakura Take’s shoulders from left and right.

“Hm?” Okakura Take lowered her head and looked up at the silver-haired woman.

No doubt about it—that silver-haired woman was Sakata Gintoki! She hadn’t expected that after turning into a woman, that lazy scoundrel would start hitting on men everywhere. Unforgivable!

“See? This handsome guy’s more interested in me,” the silver-haired woman said, turning to the black-haired one.

Because Okakura Take kept staring at Gintoki, who didn’t recognize her, he thought the handsome guy was genuinely interested in him.

In response, Hijikata grabbed Okakura Take’s arm, pulling her away. “Come on, handsome, don’t listen to that woman. Have tea with me!”

Gintoki grabbed Okakura Take’s other arm, tugging her in the opposite direction. “No, handsome, you want to have tea with me more than that fat pig.”

These two idiots! Being pulled in opposite directions, Okakura Take felt her arms almost break. Just as she tried to free herself, two cans of soda flew from the opposite side, smashing into Gintoki’s and the other woman’s heads.

“You two bitches! Get away from my man!” Yumi Nagasaki stormed up, face dark, stepping fiercely. His bearded face looked especially fierce.

“...” Okakura Take thought. Who was her man? Her man... She glanced toward Gintoki, who was sprawled on the ground, rubbing his head in pain—her man had just become her woman.

This world was truly spiraling into utter chaos!

Author’s note:

The gender-swapped Toushirou (far left), Hijikata X-ko (center, haha), and on the far right is your familiar Gintoki.

These two chapters follow the gender-swapped storyline from Gintama, manga chapter 437. Ladies interested can catch up on it.