Chapter 60: Silver Soul (Earth Arc)

After spending a week in the hospital, Take Okakura was finally discharged. However, her right hand had been so badly injured that it was still in a cast, and the doctor had instructed her to return for check-ups at intervals.

During her stay, Amayo and Shinpachi Kagura were the ones who came to visit her. That octopus, except for the first day, hadn’t shown up again. In fact, a few days ago, all the Screwdrivers had returned to being normal humans—including that octopus.

According to Shinpachi Kagura, the octopus had reverted to human form and, true to his incorrigible nature, immediately went off to play pachinko. They all agreed that, given this behavior, that curly-haired idiot might as well have stayed an octopus.

Yet, when Take Okakura was discharged, the octopus—no, he was human again now—Gintoki, with his fluffy curls, came up to her.

“Ah, those two brats are such a hassle, having to make me come pick you up from the hospital. Honestly, Gin-san has so many things to do,” he complained, running a hand through his unruly hair.

A vein throbbed on Take Okakura’s forehead. She turned away at once. “Is that so? What a pity. I’d been planning to take Shinpachi, Kagura, and Amayo out for a meal to celebrate my discharge, but since none of them showed up, I guess I’ll drop it.”

No sooner had the words left her lips than her hand was seized. She turned to see Gintoki’s ingratiating face. “Chief~~ Don’t say that. It doesn’t matter who you treat, right?”
But that doesn’t include you, you useless bum!

Gintoki reached out and took her luggage, grinning. “Come on, Chief, I’ll take you home. We’re friends, right? I even brought my car.”

Who was it just now complaining about how much trouble it was to come pick her up?

A minute later, Take Okakura found herself perched on Gintoki’s little silver scooter. She didn’t even have the energy to mock his “car,” especially with her right arm in a cast. Instead, she wrapped her left arm around his waist.

As she did so, she was surprised to feel the defined muscles beneath his shirt. For someone so lazy and undisciplined, who gorged himself on junk food and kept odd hours, he’d managed to stay in surprisingly good shape.

"Gin-san, I have to admit, I didn’t expect you to have muscles. I thought for sure you’d have a beer belly by now,” Take said.

Gintoki, fastening his helmet, turned to her. “Huh? Who are you calling lazy? Gin-san is busy, you know. And besides, I’m not one of those otaku who gets winded just climbing the stairs. I work out every night with beautiful ladies. Those shut-ins don’t get that kind of action.”

“Sorry, but all I ever see is you getting plastered every night. As for beautiful ladies, the only one I recall was that cross-dresser dragging you off the other day. You seemed fine, so I left it alone.”

“What?!” Gintoki turned, shocked. “Wait! My clothes were stripped off—how could that be nothing?! Was that the night I was dumped naked beside the trash bins? I can’t remember anything! Why didn’t you help rescue a man on the brink of disaster?”

"Because you looked so happy, Gin-san, clinging to that cross-dresser, calling out for the weather report lady. Congratulations, Gin-san—you scored both in your dreams and in real life.”

“The only thing I scored in real life was a trip to the devil’s lair! How could something that awful happen? I can’t remember a thing!” Gintoki wailed.

Take Okakura chuckled at his agitation. In truth, she’d been teasing him. That night, all he’d done was get drunk and make a scene at the bar. The owner had beaten him and thrown him out. As for his clothes? She’d seen a grizzled man in sunglasses strip them off and, to her amazement, Gin-san was wearing strawberry-print briefs. She’d decided he deserved a lesson for his drunken antics, so after watching the spectacle, she’d gone home. Gintoki had spent the night sleeping beside the trash bins, stark naked.

“Enough with the small talk. Hurry up and drive me home,” Take said, patting his shoulder with her left hand.

“How is this a small matter? This concerns Gin-san’s manly virtue! I was checkmated!” Gintoki howled.

“Oops~ Let unhappy things fiy away~,” Take sang in off-key English.

“All right, you want to fly? Hold on tight—we’re flying now!” Gintoki declared, revving the engine, forcing Take to grip his waist for dear life.

“Idiot! I was kidding! Slow down! I’m injured, do you understand? I’m a patient!” Take shouted.

“Hello, I do not know~,” Gintoki replied, equally off-key.

This jerk! Take couldn’t help but pinch his abs, giving them a hard twist. Huh—the texture’s not bad. She couldn’t resist twisting again.

“Ow, ow, ow! If you’re injured, go easy! Women these days must watch too many ‘My Sassy Girl’ movies—always so violent!” Gintoki wailed.

“Sorry, but that’s your fault, Gin-san, you booger factory! Honestly, you were much cuter as an octopus.”

At the mention of the octopus, Gintoki was momentarily at a loss. The memories of those days were like an embarrassing play. And yet, that brat had been so gentle with him back then…

Suddenly, Take Okakura leaned her head against his shoulder, making all of Gintoki’s muscles tense.

“Gin-san, I feel a bit down,” she said.

Gintoki was silent. So she did have her girlish moments.

“Why did you have to turn back into a human? Because of you, I was starting to think keeping a pet wouldn’t be so bad.”

That brat! “Hey, don’t go making people your pets at random—are you some sort of queen?” Gintoki replied lazily.

Take Okakura laughed softly. The warm breeze on Gintoki’s ear made him feel ticklish.

“Ah, I’m the demon queen who wants to conquer the Earth.”

“Didn’t expect Chief Okakura to have such chuunibyou ambitions. What, planning to slick your hair back and stand atop the frost-covered heavens?” Gintoki quipped.

“No, if I become the demon queen, I could keep all of humanity in captivity,” Take joked.

“What an impressive goal. But first, I’m hungry—Chief, could you treat me to a meal?”

“Sorry, I’m not interested in keeping a useless curly-haired bum.”

“What’s wrong with curls? They feel nice and look cute!”

“Sorry, Gin-san, but calling you cute is an insult to the word itself.”

Bantering back and forth, they finally arrived at Take Okakura’s apartment. Gintoki carried her luggage up for her.

Once inside, Gintoki acted as if it were his own home. He slipped off his shoes, went straight to the kitchen, opened the fridge, drank some milk, grabbed snacks, plopped down at the table, and turned on the TV—utterly unfazed.

Take Okakura stared. There was a lot wrong here! How could this guy rummage through her fridge, lounge on her sofa, and turn on her TV so naturally?

“Gin-san, this is my house,” Take said through clenched teeth.

“Ah, I forgot. But I was like this during that time too, so don’t mind me. Go rest,” Gintoki replied, flipping to another channel.

Take couldn’t take it anymore. She marched over and kicked him off the sofa.

“Idiot! You acted like this only because you were an octopus. Now that you’re human again, act like one!”

Gintoki lay on the floor, rubbing his head. “Chief, that’s discrimination.”

“Get out! You useless, booger-producing mophead!”

“Come on, Chief, you’re injured. Let me stay and take care of you,” Gintoki said, grabbing a bag of chips and munching away.

“Care for me? You just want to freeload, don’t you?” Take sighed. “Whatever, I’m going to bed. Leave after you finish eating.”

Gintoki remained sprawled on the floor, eating chips and watching TV, not deigning to reply.

Honestly, he’d been just like this as an octopus, but seeing him act this way as a human was infuriating. Take Okakura went to her room and slept until six in the evening. When she woke, thirsty, she shuffled to the kitchen for a glass of water.

Returning to the living room, she found the curly-haired nuisance still there.

Was he planning to settle down in her home?

“Why are you still here?” she demanded, still groggy.

“Oh, you’re up. I ordered sushi and pizza—come eat,” Gintoki waved.

Take glanced at the table—sure enough, there was already-opened sushi and pizza.

Wait, this sushi place was famous, high-end even. Where did he get the money?

Puzzled, Take sat down and opened the sushi box, only to find half of it already gone. The pizza was the same.

Looking over, she saw an open wallet on the sofa—her wallet. She picked it up; only a few bills remained.

A surge of wrath overtook her.

She advanced step by step toward Gintoki, who was lounging on the sofa.

Noticing something was wrong, Gintoki quickly sat up and backed away.

“I’m sorry, it's all my fault. I thought a patient should eat something upon waking...”

“Ahhh—!” Take promptly leapt onto the sofa and gave him a sound thrashing, then tossed his limp body to the floor.

There, she felt much better. Still, she couldn’t help but think that since turning back into a human, this guy had become even more shameless. Or perhaps he’d always been shameless, just not this much.

Ding-dong! Suddenly, her doorbell rang. Take went to the door, peered through the peephole—it was Sasaki!

She quickly stuffed Gintoki under the sofa. But then she paused; why was she acting as if she were hiding a lover?

Well, too late now. She opened the door for Sasaki.

“Ah, Mr. Sasaki, hello. I didn’t expect you to visit,” Take said with a smile.

Sasaki lifted the food box in his hand. “I heard you were discharged today, Miss Okakura, so I came to see you and to thank you for saving me last time. An elite never forgets a debt of gratitude.”

That “elite” catchphrase of his was too much.

“Well, may I come in?” Sasaki asked.

Take let him in; after all, he’d brought food—it wouldn’t do to turn him away.

At the sight of the table cluttered with snacks, sushi, and pizza, Sasaki raised an eyebrow. “Miss Okakura seems to be recovering well, but a patient should stick to lighter fare.”

He placed his own food box on the table and opened it. “These are home-cooked dishes prepared by our family chef. Simple fare—please don’t mind.”

Looking at the impressive spread, Take was speechless. Truly a young master.

“I’ll fetch some bowls and chopsticks—Mr. Sasaki, please join me,” Take said.

“Thank you, Miss Okakura,” Sasaki replied, adjusting his glasses.

Take returned with two sets of bowls and chopsticks. She saw that Sasaki had moved Gintoki’s pile of snacks to the floor, arranging his own dishes neatly on the table.

Such lavish home cooking…

Take deliberately sat on the sofa under which Gintoki was hiding, and began to eat with Sasaki. He ate little himself, spending most of the time explaining the ingredients and preparation of each dish. Take found him unexpectedly interesting, and revised her opinion of this so-called elite, habitual emailer.

All the while, she worried that the curly head under her sofa would wake up. Fortunately, he slept through the entire meal.

She almost regretted hiding him there—it was such a hassle.

After dinner, Take stood up, intending to brew some tea for Sasaki, hoping he would leave once he’d eaten and drunk his fill.

As she passed him, Sasaki took her uninjured left hand.

“Miss Okakura, I have something to tell you.”

She turned, puzzled. “What is it?”

Sasaki stood, holding her hand. "I know this is sudden, but would you consider dating me?"

“Eh? Eh!!” Take was stunned. He liked her? She’d never noticed—she’d just thought he was an email-spamming headache.

“Miss Okakura, please consider it carefully before replying. I’ll wait for your answer. For now, I’ll take my leave. Goodbye,” Sasaki said, releasing her hand and departing.

Bang! The door closed, and Take still hadn’t recovered from the shock. His confession had been so abrupt and bewildering she sat dumbly on the sofa, lost in thought.

What a pain! Such a huge hassle!

Just then, a hand suddenly clamped around her ankle.

“Eek!” Take instinctively kicked out.

“Ow! That hurts!” Gintoki complained, crawling out from under the sofa.

She’d been so rattled by Sasaki’s confession she’d completely forgotten the bum was still there.

“Oh, Gin-san, you’re awake. Well, time for you to leave. You’re human again, so stop squatting here. I’m still an innocent young woman, I don’t want to get tangled up with a bum like you,” Take said, waving him off.

But Gintoki didn’t move. She looked up, puzzled.

To her surprise, Gintoki leaned over, bracing his hands on the sofa, his head bent close to hers, crimson eyes deep and intense. Take unconsciously scooted back.

“What are you doing, Gin-san?” she asked uncomfortably.

“So, now that you have a wealthy gentleman, you’re kicking out the loyal pet who’s always been by your side? Heartless owner,” Gintoki laughed softly, a cold glint flashing in his eyes.

Take Okakura was speechless.

You’re fully human again, aren’t you! And who’s your owner anyway?

“Gin-san, sorry, but I’m not interested in keeping a lazy, gluttonous bum.”

“How can you say that? Gin-san’s easy to keep,” Gintoki replied, moving closer.

Take frowned deeply. He was acting extremely strange. Ever since turning back into a human, he’d given her all kinds of bad vibes.

In the end, she couldn’t stand it and gave him a good kick. As she thrashed him, she was relieved to see that his odd expression vanished, replaced by his familiar lazy, troublesome face. This was the Sakata Gintoki she knew best.

Sure enough, when Gin-san acted up, violence was the only way to return him to normal!

Author’s note: Next chapter, the Yoshiwara arc begins! Your beloved Veego is about to appear. Come out and play with the crazy child! The crazy child is dying to talk with you all—if I get too lonely I might die QAQ (Are you a hamster or what?!).